Why do I procrastinate? Easy, I don’t think I’ll get what I want out of attempting the goals I’m trying to achieve. So, I wait til the last minute when the pain of doing is outweighed by the agony of the self-doubt I must endure while getting my task done. Yep.
Easy to understand, harder to overcome.
I also procrastinate because when I don’t have the desired results I can always blame it on not having enough time. Versus, the very real damage that would occur to my ego if I gave myself enough time, and was still unable to produce the quality of work I wish to create.
Like I said, easy. Much harder to explain this to myself when it’s time to start staring at the blank page. Doubly so now that I’ve taken on writing as well. Now, two blank pages want to stare back at me accusingly. Fun.
Well, crap. How to carry on? Well, I haven’t been lately. This post should have been published a month ago, and I’m like 5 years behind on my other self imposed deadlines. Which leads me to think it’s time for a huge change.
Where do we go from here?
Well, I’ve started with getting real deadlines. The kind imposed by the world, since I know my standards are a bit-um, lax.
I wish I was wired differently, and I’m working on it. Until then, I’m going to apply the formula that helped me get to my first BCAF. That formula being engagement with other writers and artists in the comics community, and signing up for shows/cons.
Both come together to create public pressure, and very real deadlines. And without that since of urgency I have no hope of making my art goals happen.
So, this is how I’m moving forward.
I made a google document of all the small conventions happening in Northern California which I could get to by car, and take another artist along. This has gone a long way to re-energize me, that’s the first part of the formula.
For the rest, I’m to posting this for the public pressure. And my next post will be about getting ready for Clexacon in Las Vegas. Feel free to email, or leave a comment here, and ask me how’s my progress on my print series Fat Faeries. Thanks for helping me move towards this one. See you there!